Have you ever had that awkward moment when you took several seconds to grasp the question (Why are you angry?!?!) popped to you after shouting at your workmate?
Getting angry is a normal emotional response to any upsetting stimulus. Anyone who never gets angry needs to be confined in a mental institution! However, when this type of response (anger) is abused, or when your way of expressing anger causes emotional and physical pain to others, you might need to take a moment to re-evaluate what’s causing it.
Carrying anger is unhealthy. Not only does it affect the bearer (you) but it similarly affects the people around you, even when you are not aware of it. So really, if you are this person, what possible answers do you have for this question: “Why are you angry?”
Here are 7 possible reasons:
1. You are not contented with your life – you wish it was different.
When you are faced with many what ifs, and unachieved goals in your life, you tend to unconsciously live a life of disappointment and regret resulting to sudden burst of anger during situations that push you to your limit.
It is best to deal with this cause by making or perhaps revising the existing plans you have for your life. Assess where you are, and do necessary modifications that can help you achieve and put your life back on track in achieving and working toward these goals.[/one_half_last]
2. You are trapped in an unhappy relationship.
Whether it is a relationship with your family, friends or even your workmates; unhappy relationships may result to keeping you in a constant alert for getting angry. Because you are isolated in an environment that does not make you happy, you find the smallest stimulus to be reasons for bursting out in rage.
Take time to reassess the relationship and decide to let it go if you find yourself consistently unhappy. When you find the freedom from this prison, you are able to see beyond the relationship and probably find reasons to be happy. Remember that when you are happy, you cannot get angry; the two can never coexist.
3. Unresolved issues from the past.
Most anger issues are secondary to a childhood experience that was never resolved. Studies show that most persons with anger issues to being raised from a dysfunctional family, having an alcoholic, abusive parents, or growing without parents.
When you decide to confront and accept these issues, you are giving a room for dealing with your anger issues. The most important step in dealing with anger issues is acceptance and self-awareness that you have it[/one_half_last]
4. Unachieved ambitions.
Say you’ve always wanted to earn a college degree but you couldn’t because you need to work on double shifts to pay for the house rent. Though you realize and understand the reasons for your unachieved ambitions, there will always be something in your subconscious mind that nags you about it; thus, resulting to anger issues.
You need to acknowledge that not every plan can work out; but it does not necessarily mean that you have no fall back. Think of what other better things you could do to achieve that ambition and work on it, instead of repeatedly torturing and blaming your life situation from depriving you of such dreams.
5. You fall short of taking good care of yourself.
You used to be a size 4 and now that has doubled! You hate to admit that it was your fault (not living a healthy lifestyle) why this happened. No matter how much you rationalize and look for intellectualizations to support your bad practice, the guilt of not taking good care of yourself will still nag you and cause your angry outbursts.
Take some time to reflect and acknowledge your wrong doing. Instead of going with the flow and disregarding what needs to be done to address this issue, do the opposite and do something to gain back your self-worth. Start scheduling your day and insert a little time for exercise, cut back on unhealthy fast-food meals and start eating healthy. Taking good care of yourself and health will give you a feeling of accomplishment and can help you deal with your anger issues.[/one_half_last]
6. You’ve grown to be someone different; someone you don’t recognize anymore.
Certain criticisms hurt us so much that we do things in order to avoid them. For instance you have been criticized for being such a geek who wears glasses and big trousers all the time that no boys find you attractive. You deal with the problem by morphing into somebody else who wears clothes the “old” you never wears. Though uncomfortable, you find it effective as the criticisms and bullying stopped.
While this techniques work; it only works temporarily. When it is something you are forced to do, you will end up compromising the things you love; in this case, yourself. Acknowledge the things you want to happen – do you want people to appreciate you for being somebody you are not or do you want to just be yourself regardless of how people see you?
7. A specific unfortunate event has traumatized you.
Most anger issues spring from trauma. When a person faces one, anything – event, person, situation that reminds you of the pain can become a stimulus for getting angry. If the situation is becoming worse, it is important to consult a professional for help.
Realizing and acknowledging the reasons for your angry outbursts can help you understand your behavior (why you get angry); and when you do, you can now choose your own ways to deal with it. If you cannot handle it yourself, you can ask professional help. It is vital to know the reasons why you get angry so you can find ways to deal with